Wednesday, September 30, 2009

Thoughts

I felt as if I was in high school again this weekend~ My son had his school festival and it being his first year in school I wanted to give as much as I could. We sold the raffle tickets, donated all the needed items, worked the festival and donated something to the silent auction. I felt good until I went to the actually festival. Wow to my surprise it is like a whole new world and where do I fit in. It was like I was a freshman in high school again so many cliches and lines drawn in the sand. There was every group right there, just like in high school. And at that moment I had that feeling of insecurity! It has always been hard for me to make friends quickly. I am very quiet in surroundings I am not comfortable with. I have been mistaken for a snob on so many levels because of it. Little did they know how insecure I felt, what to say and what not to stay....just easier to stay quiet. When I am at work or in my element I am a chatty Cathy and in new settings a misfit!
I guess in a way I have felt insecure in my blogging and that causes me to stop and start. Afraid to move ahead..... fear no one will read my blog....fear that I will be standing on the sideline. The other day I actually asked my husband well how do you become friends with someone... sad huh.
So I look at all these blogs and the closeness of some of you sweet girls. Can someone tell me how do you get there, how do you fit in so well.
Not knowing the answer it leads me to this, get out there girl. You enjoy blogging, put more effort into it. My Mom always said you "the more you put into something the more you get".
Buy until I get there can anyone give me a clue?
Now the festival and the Mothers there, a whole other story I am going to have to tell on another day~

Bristol

12 comments:

  1. I love it when you blog, even tho I am lousy about making sure I comment. And I have felt the same way you do about blogging. And I guess my only advice would be to keep at it, and try to just be yourself and not worry about what others will think. Seems like when I try to blog to please others no one even notices, but when I am just myself, then people join in...Funny huh? Sorry the fair wasn't fun. School functions were always a little strange for me too until I started working at the kids new school.

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  2. I have been in this same situation so many times. I am not one to jump right in nor do I have a strong persaonality as a result, I usually end up getting my feelings hurt. You could not pay me to go back to high school. Why can't we all be like kindergarten when we just loved everybody and no one got left out! I enjoy your blog. I love the advice given by Jerusalem, just be yourself. Have fun with it. I try not to worry about it and just have fun with it myself! Don't quit!

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  3. Oh, I do believe I could have written this post. I am the same way in new situations. In fact, when I first met my husband in college he thought I was a snob. Thankfully, he soon realized that wasn't the case!

    Sometimes I wonder why I blog. Is anyone reading? Does it bore them to tears? But then I remember that I am really blogging for myself. I enjoy it and it is a creative outlet. Sure, I still wish I had more followers, more comments, etc. but I am going to keep at it anyway. I hope you do, too!

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  4. Amen! I could have written this post too. For my whole life I've felt like I'm on the outside looking in and like other people all just jump in and become friends really quickly. I am quiet in new situations and feel completely insecure a lot of the time! I feel the same about blogging. Your blog is wonderful and your writing is great! I think I'm finally learning (at 44) that I need to stop worrying so much about what other people think. I'm never going to be the most friendly, outgoing person on earth and that's fine - I think finding a few friends who accept you and love you is what matters. You'll find your place in the school - ours was the same way and I just started volunteering and met lots of great people. Hang in - it will all work out!!

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  5. Well my dear, I just love your blog because I know it is real, you are telling real stories and feelings, I like that. I think being yourself is the most important thing, telling everyday stories that affect your life, not writing to please everyone, but writing for yourself. I am very quiet in a new setting, I don't do well in crowds either....I am much better one on one or just two or three girls...I get intimidated and insecure..I hated high school...and never fit in college either. Just keep at the blogging, you are wonderful don't forget that! :)

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  6. Tara couldn't have said it better than I.

    I might add that I've grown a lot and developed who I am by reading other's blogs. People who are willing to share WAY more than I has encouraged me to pop my head out of my shell...just a little. People who are WAY more creative than I, has encouraged me to attempt that project that perhaps intimidated me in the past.

    Draw strength of others as your strength for a short while. Allow yourself to get stretched, pulled and pushed to be the best Bristol you can be by going on the hunt for what it is that is YOUR true happiness.

    You are a dear Theta friend, and I miss when you're not blogging!

    XOXOXO

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  7. holy moly...where do i start!
    keep doing what you are doing...and just write what ever the heck you want!
    I do.
    I don't write to please people...i write my day to day and i am just like i write in person.
    i'm funny and maybe not the most outgoing person but i like to be around people.
    you just have to be who you are...
    which it seems like..everyone loves;-)
    xo

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  8. I think we all feel like that from time to time. Don't quit blogging..I love reading your blog, a lot of us do! Don't worry about those other people. You know you are a wonderful person, the people who love you know you are a wonderful person, and the rest of them are just missing out because they like to pre-judge or not let anyone "new" in. It is their loss! You keep going and sharing your thoughts.. look how many people you have helped just by posting this.. We are all here for you, always!

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  9. Be yourself. Get yourself out of your comfort zone. The amazing women I have met has been at conferences, shows etc. It is such a fun environment to hang out and get to know one another. Write for you...no one else.

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  10. Write for yourself... in the beginning i had no idea what i was doing and was afraid of what others would think and slowly the more I posted the more comfortable it was. and i think others pick up on that.
    have a wonderful weekend,
    LuLu

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  11. Well, for one, I'm glad you are back. I may not always comment, but I do enjoy your blog. I don't really have anything new to add, other than to ditto what everyone else has said. Write for yourself. That is certainly what I do and heck, when people mention to me that they read it, well it always kinda shocks me. LOL. Cause I don't think about anyone actually reading it. As for friendships, blog or otherwise, sometimes you have to put yourself out there. It seems like the older I get the harder it is and more of an effort it takes. Anyway, glad you are back.

    -c
    yapping cat

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  12. Hi Bristol :)

    Funny.... I think you fit in more than I do. I feel like a huge outsider everywhere I go, except in my own home. I don't make friends easily either and I think that's why I enjoy blogging, because although a friendly place you can be detached. Does that make sense?

    Anyway, YOU are fabulous and I was thrilled when you came back. I love your blog :)

    (((hugs)))
    rue

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